Математически хумор

[Kitty]

Айде сега да видим кой се интересува от математика и кой не. Аз лично обожавам математически хумор, но ми става тъжно, когато повечето ми колеги не могат да схванат вица... Та, дано се намери някой друг като мен тук. Започвам с много удобни извинения защо си без домашно:



10. It's Isaac Newton's birthday.

9. I couldn't decide whether i is the square root of -1 or i are the square root of -1.

8. I accidently divided by 0 and my paper burst into flames.

7. It's stuck inside a Klein bottle.

6. I could only get arbitrarily close to my textbook.

5. I had too much pi and got sick.

4. Someone already published it, so I didn't bother to write it up.

3. A four-dimensional dog ate it.

2. I have a solar calculator and it was cloudy.

1. There wasn't enough room to write it in the margin.


И малко определения на често използвани думи:

CLEARLY: I don't want to write down all the in-between steps.

TRIVIAL: If I have to show you how to do this, you're in the wrong class.

OBVIOUSLY: I hope you weren't sleeping when we discussed this earlier, because I refuse to repeat it.

RECALL: I shouldn't have to tell you this, but for those of you who erase your memory tapes after every test, here it is again.

WITHOUT LOSS OF GENERALITY: I'm not about to do all the possible cases, so I'll do one and let you figure out the rest.

ONE MAY SHOW: One did, his name was Gauss.

IT IS WELL KNOWN: See "Mathematische Zeitschrift'', vol XXXVI, 1892.

CHECK FOR YOURSELF: This is the boring part of the proof, so you can do it on your own time.

SKETCH OF A PROOF: I couldn't verify the details, so I'll break it down into parts I couldn't prove.

HINT: The hardest of several possible ways to do a proof.

BRUTE FORCE: Four special cases, three counting arguments, two long inductions, and a partridge in a pair tree.

SOFT PROOF: One third less filling (of the page) than your regular proof, but it requires two extra years of course work just to understand the terms.

ELEGANT PROOF: Requires no previous knowledge of the subject, and is less than ten lines long.

SIMILARLY: At least one line of the proof of this case is the same as before.

CANONICAL FORM: 4 out of 5 mathematicians surveyed recommended this as the final form for the answer.

THE FOLLOWING ARE EQUIVALENT: If I say this it means that, and if I say that it means the other thing, and if I say the other thing...

BY A PREVIOUS THEOREM: I don't remember how it goes (come to think of it, I'm not really sure we did this at all), but if I stated it right, then the rest of this follows.

TWO LINE PROOF: I'll leave out everything but the conclusion.

BRIEFLY: I'm running out of time, so I'll just write and talk faster.

LET'S TALK THROUGH IT: I don't want to write it on the board because I'll make a mistake.

PROCEED FORMALLY: Manipulate symbols by the rules without any hint of their true meaning.

QUANTIFY: I can't find anything wrong with your proof except that it won't work if x is 0.

FINALLY: Only ten more steps to go...

Q.E.D. : T.G.I.F.

PROOF OMITTED: Trust me, it's true.

[kriskata]

мн е забавно...както сичко у фми

[moridinbg]

[innamorata]

[quanchi]

Тва не го разбирам все още хич, което значи че не съм погълнат изцяло от матрицата

[GTS]

хахаха, част от нещата са в пълна сила преведени на български (и чути в лекции)

[Kitty]

Тва не го разбирам все още хич, което значи че не съм погълнат изцяло от матрицата

Не искам никога повече да чувам за матрици, детерминанти, адюнгирани количества и подобни....

[quanchi]

Да мине 4ти и тогава мога да кажа дали ще чувам още за тях, току виж до септември само за матрици и детерминанти трябва да мисля

[GTS]

детерминантите ще спасят света, формулите на Жегалкин вселената, а Бул е най-големия пич!

[omgwtfnonoway]

http://www.vbox7.com/play:9c63c645

[FloWersOfEviL]

Ето какво намерих аз из нета, докато се чудех как ще си взема изпита по математика:

Q: What does the zero say to the the eight?
A: Nice belt!

Theorem. A cat has nine tails.
Proof. No cat has eight tails. Since one cat has one more tail than no cat, it must have nine tails.

Q: What is the most erotic number?
A: 2110593!
Q: Why?
A: When 2 are 1 and don't pay at10tion, they'll know within 5 weeks whether or not, after 9 months, they'll be 3...

Teacher: "Who can tell me what 7 times 6 is?"
Student: "It's 42!"
Teacher: "Very good! - And who can tell me what 6 times 7 is?"
Same student: "It's 24!"

Teacher: What is 2k + k?
Student: 3000!

Life is complex: it has both real and imaginary components.

Q: How does a mathematician induce good behavior in her children?
A: `I've told you n times, I've told you n+1 times...'

"Statistics shows that most people are abnormal!"
"How that?"
"According to statistics, a normal person has one breast and one testicle..."

И любимото ми, което още не съм сигурна къде е грешката и дали има въобще такава :

If x=0.9999…

10x = 9.9999…
10x - x = 9.9999… - 0.9999…
9x = 9
x=1

Therefore 0.9999… = 1

And the universe implodes.

[abstract]

еми няма грешка
имаш сума на безкрайна геометрична прогресия с частно 0<q<1 ( нулева редица)
q=1/10 , a1=0,9
a2=0,09 , a3=0,009 и т.н.
тогава сумата и S=0,9(9) и като я сметнеш чрез формулата която се получава при граничен преход от страндартната.
S=a1/(1-q) получаваш S=0,9/(1-0,1)=0,9/0,9=1
или по-обобщено x,9(9)=x+0,9(9)=x+1

[FloWersOfEviL]

Благодаря за усилието да ми го обясниш, ама не съм от ФМИ... формула, която се получава при граничен какво?

[quanchi]

Q: What is the most erotic number?
A: 2110593!
Q: Why?
A: When 2 are 1 and don't pay at10tion, they'll know within 5 weeks whether or not, after 9 months, they'll be 3...

аааа уникално

[Jorkataa]

Лелеее колко са ви яки математическите вицовееееееее едвам не се разплаках от смях...